Finally an update...hey at least i update...unlike some *cough* kia *cough*
Ok soooo i cant be bothered 2 read wot i last posted but here is an overall view of current emotional situation: I hate paul because he is a nob.
I have romantic interests in a few boys...dave is one of them...which im not very happy about because...i dont like the name dave...sorry to all daves out there but im serious!
Ummm and since i have cut paul out of my life almost every day has been a happy day in the world of cat im pretty much more or less back to my old happy self that i completly forget existed and shock horror im starting to like my body again....well not the stomach but my legs r winning back my favour- way 2 go legs.
Still my ed tendencies worry me but if i keep concentratin on not goin on tho proed sites and myspazs ill grow out of it its not like i ever acted on it except once but only for 3 days and it was weird but it wont happen again besides i dnt have the self control 2 have an ed...weird that i wanted 1 i guess i did and still see it as a quick fix diet and i kno all risks i just choose to pretend they dont exist but serious guys i will not go down that path if i keep the way im feeling up :D
So this means i have choose to tell paul 2 fuck off when he tried to do one of those lets talk 2 cat as if we never had an argument and make friends again just soi can cause an argument a few days later blame it all on her and makeher feel bad yah. So no more miss nice cat, i have proved to you all- I HAVE A SPINE lol. I just find it really hard to hold grudges and hate ppl thats all but hes bad for me i kno that and i steer clear from things bad 4 me these days woop woop etc.
Umm nursery placement has been awesome so far, settled in, learnt names i OF COURSE have my favourites- baby caitlin i frickin love her 2 pieces im sure every1 knos cos i give her loads of attention. i secretly love declan cos he loves me haha. and i love jude cus he is just the cutest lil boy i have ever seen. annnnd matthew because he is so clever and sounds cute when he says thankyou it is more like "tanktoo" (bear in mind tho he is not 2 til end of july...i dont kno wot stage they shud be at but in my mind he is clever ok lol) and i love babbbby lilly becuz she is 3 n a half months old and she smiled at me first out of the whole nursery and it was so cute it made me squeal and made people jealous lol. and karmel i love because she speaks so good. and some other kid i think shes called leanne cos shes super clever and asks me to read her books all the time which is nice becauseusually i read one page nt he kids get bored but she la-la-loves it. Im aware these names mean nothing 2 u but i reli cant be bothered 2 tell u bout all of them cos there r far 2 mani!
Ahhh i have a headache today from kelsie cryin her head off- no1 knows why she was sad...apparantly she used to be a reli happy baby but since her chest infection shes always cryin she occasionally stops after a cuddle but as soon as u hand her over 2 sum1 els she starts bawling again. As well as that recnetly they thought her arm was broke i have no idea why but she had x rays n stuff. But i must remain objective and not make assumptions so i shant even begin 2 think the unthinkable.
Sooo did i mention the rents went away for 2 weeks? Got another week yet- woop woop! And i have learnt liz is goin away dis wkend so although i am goin 2 bris late fri nite for a small piss up i may have some ppl over on saturday or sumthin, last weekend ben was out of the house the whole time and i LOVED havin the house 2 miself- absoloutly LOVED it so im hopin hes gna go off dis weekend too- fingers crossed!
It is so cold in my room right now i dont kno why but the radiators wont go on cos for sum reason it stays warm downstairs so i am always iced up here.
Since the rents r away they stocked up our fridge n freezer but sinc eits two weeks they left us some bucks. I just got my 20 off liz and went shopping...20 quid for a week....seriously i dnt fink ill cover it i was gettin bundles of somerfield simple value eg tins of hot dogs, pizza for 50p (i couldnt resist the bargain) etc. I shud of gon 2 tesco reli haha got sum tesco value! Either way i dont think its gonna last me the rest of the week but if it doesnt my mum is only a fone call away to bring round a few extra supplies so no1 needs to worry bout me starvin (not that wud be a problem it wud do me good reli lol got to stop talkin lyk dt do i sound like a despo ed myspazzer and believe me after adding like 50 of them i kno wot they sound like they post myspaz bulletins like "fatty needs to stop eating" "it is never enough" "Im 102lbs but i need to loose 20 more lbs to be at my GW" they have their phrases... GW (goal weight) CW (current weight) HW (heighest weight) LW (lowest weight) they r always so sad and strive for perfection they long to see their bones poke through and they post pictures of skinny people to each other and they say to each other stuff like "Stay strong" "think thin" it is scary and it interests me but i digress
Anyways so i had a chinese tonite (big time) though i dont feel full up (since i have this cold ive been super hungry) tho it may jus be im thirsty- my throat is sore and my lips r dry n my mouth is dry so that wud make sense right... gosh that nutrition woman that came in2 college hu banged on about water would verbally murder moi!
So i bought other stuff neway like choc ices, time out bars, skips.....just snack food and i bet u anything ben will eat some of it ive put most of my stuff in the fridge drawer and hope no1 goes in it but i wudnt be suprised.
Im steering clear of ben cuz with me bein ill but still havin 2 work @ placement 9-4 and sometimes later i reli dont have the energy for an argument. Theres no reason 2 fink we will have an argument but he seems irritable and him and liz had a huge slanging match cos she told him 2 clean up and he was liek be patient and she was like well it has to be don and he went on wild bangin bout how she shud be patient and how she tries to take control and how hes hold his tongue for so long over her but he cant stand 2 be around her and hes movin out soon cos of her and every1 hates her. Then he told her 2 fuck off and she goes dont swear at me nad he goes fuck off i just did u prick and all this. And she was like u need to learn 2 have some respect and he was liek fuck off respect 4 u n all dis he had the last word obviously he was goin mental and while it amused me as arguments do i still didnt wna get involved as i reli cbf wiv arguments.
Back to the paul situ btw he was slaggin me off 2 bri yday. He goes cat is dik n that. N i told bri 2 tell him 2 keep his opinons 2 himself cos i kno a lot of ppl dt fink low of him. Den he told bri 2 tell me 2 get ova him n go and get a new boyfriend and stop tryin it on wiv him and then she had to go so i text him (somethin i aint don for months) and i sed 2 him "Paul ive got ur num out of my phonebook so i can tell u 2 stop bullshitting to MY mates. Oh and btw dont flatter urself, im well over you, you may aswell be dead to me. And as for trying it on with you i aint spoke let alone flirted with you in weeks if not months. If your as happy as u say you are then do me a favour and never mention my name again. Dont bother texting back i really cba with an argument as im ill and i really aint got the energy." Anyways he didnt text back so hopefully he got the message and will leave me n my friends alone it reli bugs me havin him tryn 2 speak 2 me every so often and passing messages it jus bugs me. Of course i still care for me. But i dont love him and i dont cry about him at all anymore. Ok so i sometimes check his bebo- i kno mani girls that do this its hard not to- at a click of a button u can look at who they are talkin 2 n wot theyve been up 2 and altho it makes u sick all these lovey dovey comments from the new gf its addictive i cant help it- lol i kno its terribke
James was encouraging me to get revenge on paul after he sent me this REALLY nasty email, i was in such a good mood thatday the email didnt upset me it just pised me off a bit and james reli got me into the angry, dont get mad get even mood and he was like "Ooh so hes getting a new car, we should get some eggs if you get me" and just stuff like that. Then grace said i shud send him some of her cats poo in a matchbox i was like wtf lol.
Anyways im gonna head downstairs and get a choc bar and drink and maybe watch a lil tv if i can be fukd 2. Im reli in one of those ugh bored but cba 2 make an effort do nethin moods. C'est not bien.
Im going to speak to you in english/french now just because i feellike it. Bear in mind im crap at french so this wont sound right at all.
Je detest le language francais parce que c'est merdi. Je ponce que merdi means shit mais je suis not sure. Vous will notice that mon francais est not all francais this is parce que je suis merdi a francais. Un thing je deteste about francais est la fact that la objects must be le or la why can vous not just choose whicever un takes your fancy. Why must they be male or female. Cest stupide et rubbish. J'ai not paragraphed in this because je cant be bothered. Je ponce que from the look of my francais skills i would not make such a bien pen pal to the francais people. Unless they knew anglais very well et could understand mon half anglais, half francais way of writing. As long as they did not write to moi in half anglais half francais mais instead full anglais je would be happy and find it fantastque et i would ask many questions such as "do vous aime le legs frog" je would say it like that parce que je ponce que they say things like that, je know they say stuff like "le pencil rouge" je suis very dissapointed i cant remember what pencil is in francais. Jai forgotten many words mais its ok as je still got a C in my GCSES. Je was never that good at francais anyway et in la end mon teacher- madame harvey decided to put moi on foundation gcse- je did everything else hier tier so it was weird doing la foundation tier as it was so frickin easy! Seriously it was like vous got a picture of four animals et it clearly said la name of it eg u see a serpent a chien a chat et un poison and it clerly says serpent and in such a small spac eusually aswel je wont make un example as it would still be half anglais. im goin 2 go now my half francaishalf anglais of random ramblings has become a mainpart of my blog. This makes me sad. I wish i could remember the word for sad as this would of made a perfect ending. Oh well
AU REVIOUR!
